To become the people we want to become, there are a lot of things we need to learn and give up
One of the things we would have to develop is the kind of mindset for the place we are headed
I am not anywhere near there but, my journey has been a bit easier because I am developing these mindsets
Note the word “ developing”
I am still embibbin them and sometimes, I fail at them but, I keep showing up and getting better
“I am an excellent Person, I live an excellent life”
This isn’t just about having a positive proclamation.
When we have this mindset towards ourselves, what happens is that, we treat ourselves like people who live excellent lives.
We approach everything that we do also with the mindset of excellence
Conversations with yourself will then go in this manner
“I am an excellent person and excellent people live like this (inserts what needs to be done)
That standard becomes the ground on which you decide everything that you do.
“If I fail more than you, I win”
This is a quote from Seth Godin and a very powerful one at that,
Too often, the thing holding us back from doing the things we need to do to build the life we dream of is FEAR
Could be fear of failure or fear of rejection but, fear nonetheless.
Having this mindset makes fear a part of my lifestyle.
I no longer fear and instead, I gravitate towards it.
It has made me understand that doing it afraid is how I win and become who I want to become
For us to become the people we want to become, we must become comfortable with failure and to be comfortable with failure, we need this third mindset
“Every action I take is to learn what works, learn what doesn’t and do more of the former”
This mindset changes everything that we do from actions aimed at a specific goal to actions aimed at learning.
You cannot be afraid of failing when your intent for taking action is to learn.
We become afraid of failing or rejection when our intent for taking action is aimed at something specific we want in terms of praise or notice or money
Make everything always about learning.
“I choose discomfort on purpose”
Discomfort on purpose simply means
“choosing to be uncomfortable am deeply do the things we need to do to build our dream lives”
Growth doesn’t occur in our comfort zones.
Most of us know this but, when we are faced with situations that make us uncomfortable, when we hit a roadblock on a goal we have, a lot of us chicken out.
I have never set out to do something and it went smoothly.
In my 8 months of content creation, it has never happened.
You need to accept that with every new goal you want to smash and every new level you want to attain, discomfort is waiting at your doorstep.
I recently got a mentor and was scolded very fiercely by them.
I felt terrible but, what they were scolding me on is something I need to work on if I want to be an excellent person.
The 1% have a different lifestyle and my mentor is a 1% member so when she came for me, I felt bad and knew I had to level up.
Now, I could have chosen to retreat from the mentorship besides, no one was scolding me when I was without a mentor but, very few people if any would have called me out on my nonsense
Every time we are faced with doing something easier versus going through some pain and putting in the work, choose discomfort
The discomfort is the sign we are growing and stretching ourselves
“It is all part of a plan”
I know this sounds very zen-ish
I have though come to realize when things are not going the way I want them to go that it isn’t supposed to at the time.
I am single right now in my life and for the first time in close to a year of me being single, it hit me that I am truly not ready to be in a relationship
This hit me while I was watching a youtbe video with Jay Shetty and his wife
Now, for a while I have been imagining when I will meet the brother that will sweep me off my feet but, as I watched that video, I realized I have lost how to love
I knew what it was like but, I just have become too guarded to really love because of past experiences
The biggest sign being that, I was looking for someone to come and sweep me off my feet and treat me right and the rest
but, I had barely thought of treating the other person right or someone to share my love with
The conversations had become about me.
Imagine if I met someone today, I would be anything but ready to be with them because I just am not ready and I believe, the universe knows it.
Next time things do not go like you planned, remind yourself “ this is also part of the plan”, go through it and keep moving.
This will make it possible for you and I to focus on what we can control versus wasting time on what we cannot control
“The how is not my business, action is”
Too often we spend too much time worrying about”how”
How will we meet our dream partners.
How will we fall in love
How will we build this multi-million dollar company
But, the how is not our business.
Our business is in drawing up a plan and focusing on taking continuous action.
We cannot figure out how no matter how hard we try.
And, most likely most of what we have planned will not work out as we have planned it.
Instead, simply focus on taking action, step by step, we build the life we dream of
“You do not have to see the entire staircase, just take the first step”- Martin Luther King Jr
What will separates us from the pack and help us achieve our goals faster is not worrying about the how, it is taking action.
“This too shall pass”
This is particularly a humbling minset to have.
Fact is, for every thing, good or bad in our lives, it will pass
When we understand this, we do not get super excited when things work out or get super depressed when things don’t
We will simply remind ourselves in the middle of all that chaos, this too shall pass
Doing this helps us gain some control over emotional highs and lows
“Excuses are for losers”
There will aways be a million reasons why we cannot do the things we need to do
And yet, there are people who are getting those things done on very little, less than we have
When we want to make excuses for why we could not do something we need to do to derive the results we want
we need to remember “excuses are for losers”
This isn’t a very easy mindset to have. Even I have fallen to making excuses every now and then
The point is, once we have this mindset, we are challenging ourselves to a lifestyle of excellence verus mediocrity
“I am not defined by my wins, failure or peoples opinion”
For most of us, when we fail at something or make a mistake.
When no one comments on our posts or give us thumbs up, w feel like we are failures
You feel down and until we gain that validation, we almost cannot perform.
Building this mindset helps us place a distinction between our wins, our failures and ourselves
We exist regardless of whether we fail or not
We are forced not to let our egos control us and when we screw up, to remember we are human and that is okay.
It will pass and if we keep applying ourselves, we will get better.
Which Of These Do You Really Need To Work On?
Mine would be mindset 1.
I am currently getting better at self discipline
And, this has been a very empowering mindset for me to do what I need to get done.